Making tough decisions is… well… tough. Difficult. Challenging. A dreaded phenomenon. All of that. But they have to be made.
I am a VERY indecisive person. I do not say that lightly. Just a little history: I went to the fabric store with my Nanny (my grandma) to look for patterns and fabric to make my daughters’ Christmas dresses last year and it took nearly 3 HOURS just to decide on what fabric I wanted to use. Thankfully Nanny said she’s indecisive too so she understood the struggle and was patient with me. If it took 3 hours for that, you can only imagine how long it takes me to decide on other, more life-altering things.
Over the last eight months or so I’ve really tried to focus and not only allow God to make decisions for me, and trust that He’ll do what’s best for me, but also be open and ready to receive His response when He provides it.
Now, that’s not extremely easy because I’m the type to make schedules, plan everything ahead of time and know what’s going on, but it’s working!
When I was laid off, I had to decide whether I was going to go back to work right away or not.
God told me not to.
Despite people telling me I needed to go back, or asking how was I going to provide for my kids, how were bills going to be paid. I had to ignore all of that because PEOPLE aren’t the Author of my life. They didn’t know me before I was formed in my mother’s womb. They’re human just like I am. And as humans we’re bound to make mistakes. I looked for work, but got no responses. Yet I trusted in God, and waited for His instruction. Then BOOM! The PERFECT job came around and was basically placed in my lap! (Mind you, I prayed that what was for me be placed in my lap because I didn’t want to do something God didn’t want me to do – won’t He do it!)
Ok, one successful God driven decision made! Yes! Now they haven’t all been like this. I’ve allowed my SELF to make decisions, even after God clearly told me No! And they resulted in necessary lessons learned. They usually involved “men.”
I had gone through a breakup. And I kept thinking “there’s no way we had so much fun in our relationship for us NOT to be together – He’ll change into what I need him to be and we’ll make it work.” Initially, I decided I would completely let go, until we talked about being “friends.” So every once in a while we would text each other. One night he asked if he could see me. I agreed. I was done with my plans earlier than expected so I called him, only to find out his number had been changed! He was texting me from an old phone number, and never gave me the new one! I WAS FURIOUS! When I asked why he would do that, his response was we rarely talked anyway.
I was so hurt!
Here he was trying to convince me he missed me and was thinking about me.
I fell for it.
Only to get the BIGGEST slap in the face (figuratively speaking).
God had told me when we broke up, “He is NOT your husband.”
But once again I allowed my SELF to convince me that I want to be married, and since no one is asking me out, he MUST be it! He’s the only one showing me attention, some of the time (I clearly needed to read my post Hidden at this point). Boy was I wrong.
God TOLD ME! Clear as day. Yet I was trying to keep this guy at arms length just in case. I needed to let him go completely – we couldn’t be friends.
My own disobedience caused that unnecessary heartache. Had I simply stuck to my guns and erased his texts instead of responding, this wouldn’t have happened.
When it comes to decision making, and deciding based on God advising us, we CANNOT have second thoughts. Those second thoughts are us saying, “Ok God, I appreciate the help and all, but I think I know better than You on this one.”
AND WE DON’T!
We will NEVER know better than God!
Yes it’s hard to keep going in a direction where you’re feeling hurt or torn apart from something you really care about. But let me ask you this: Did God tell you to get involved with it anyway?
Not everyone has struggles like I do. Every woman doesn’t get caught up by lust and men. But what about your job? Your major in school? Ministry?
You have to be honest with yourself. If you didn’t consult with the Father before doing something, how do you know it was meant for you to do it? And when, not if, WHEN God pulls you away from something He didn’t plan for your life, you cannot be mad at God, your boss, your ex, your friend, random people – because YOU chose to proceed without God.
But you have to forgive yourself, take it as a lifelong lesson learned and move forward. That is now part of your testimony, and you never know how that will help someone else. So don’t hide it under a rock and be ashamed, use it to help others.
Once you make the decision to live for Christ, you have to stick to that too! There will be hard times. You will have to be patient because He does not answer questions instantly all of the time. You will have to wait. But at least you know you’re God-led vs self-led. My SELF has gotten me into trouble more times than I can count. God has NEVER caused me trouble. God wins!
I love this design I’ve seen various places:
He is greater than i.